Dont try this at home

Dont try this at home

Every televised sporting event seems to incite an optimistic ‘I could do that’ attitude in the nation. The World Cup has us out in the park with a football, throwing ourselves round like the next Ronaldo. Wimbledon sees us digging out grubby sweatbands and wooden tennis racquets from the loft. Even Crufts makes us eye up the Labrador, wondering whether it could leap through a flaming hoop.

Now the Sochi Winter Olympics 2014 will have us wanting to slalom like David Ryding and Chemmy Alcott (stars of Team GB Alpine skiing team – but you already knew that). Before you hit the slopes, kit yourself out with the latest technology.

Just as likely to produce a glut of You’ve Been Framed-style mishaps as impressive fast-paced action is the Proporta Camera Demon (?24.95), which allows you to attach your camera to your helmet and film yourself and your companions performing death-defying stunts.

If your fitness level is less than peak, Ski MOJO (?325), the spring-loaded leg support, will take a third of the strain off your legs, allowing you to ski harder and longer.

If you’re in Verbier and find yourself unusually disorientated after a liquid-lunch, breathe a sigh of relief with Ski Armadillo, the free app that guides you back to your chalet wherever you are on the mountain with GPS. It also keeps skiers abreast of the weather and ski-lift status, records their top speeds, and most importantly, ensures they know where to party.

And for the skier who has everything: the Oakley Airwave 1.5 (?520) snow goggles. Part high performance eyewear, part smartphone, these intelligent goggles do almost everything other than back massages. Viewing texts from your iPhone via Bluetooth is the tip of the iceberg: you can update Facebook from the slopes, plus assess your performance with sensor information that includes altitude, speed and vertical descent data.

But for now, it might be worth learning the lessons of former attempts at sporting prowess. The football ended up in a tree, Dad pulled his groin attempting an overhead volley, and the dog still smells of singed hair.

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